Hi Dave,
I have never been married so I don't feel very qualified to be giving
advice, but I want you to know that I am thinking of you and hope that you
can find a good solution. This newsgroup has very little traffic, but
there
is a message board at www.ostomates.org with lots of wonderful people. You
may find a bigger pool of advice there, and I'm quite sure you'll find
lots
of moral sup****t.
As far as any advice I can offer, I think it might be best to press for
therapy. It will probably help and it can't hurt anything. Your Stoma Care
Nurse or doctor may be able to refer you to a marriage/family counsellor
who
understands how the onset of disability and stoma-related body changes can
affect relation****ps. That way you and your wife can deal with your whole
relation****p and not dance around the changes related to your urostomy.
Take care.
Colleen
"Dave111" <nospam@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> wrote in message
news:ea389497607102eadb624984262a62e2@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
>I find myself in a quite depressing situation and could do with some
> advice. I had urostomy surgery a few years ago and since then my wife
and
> I have not been ***ually active apart from one attempt that did not go
> well. She has now told me that she'd like to be able to find someone
else
> to have casual *** with because she cannot deal with my urostomy bag. I
> don't know what to do about this. Our relation****p in general is poor,
but
> we have a young family and don't want to split up. I have suggested that
> we
> go to a therapist, but she says it won't help. I know she is very
> depressed
> and frustrated at having no *** life, but I just don't know if I can
deal
> with her having a physical relation****p with someone else. All comments
> and advice appreciated. Thanks.
>
> --
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