New here

My brother died last Friday and I'm not dealing with it very well.  He had
a 
long and painful battle with cancer.  I know he is finally free of pain
and 
chemo, etc., etc. - but he is no longer here and I miss him.  One of his 
last wishes was to be cremated and have us spread his ashes in one of his 
favorite wooded spots on some waterways he used to canoe on.  He is the 
first in our family to be cremated and I respect his wishes and understand

how special this particular part of the country is to him.  I think one 
thing I'm having trouble with is the waiting - it will be at least a month

or more before we spread his ashes due to the snow and ice in his chosen 
area.  I understand and agree with this - that is not a problem.  I just 
keep feeling like I should be doing something because when our parents and

my husband's parents died  there were many things to take care of and to 
prepare for with the services, buriel, etc.  I am sad and grieving for him

but I also feel lost.  It is hard to go about life as if nothing has 
happened.  I know I need the closure that services and funerals give you
but 
his wish was to have no services, only the private spreading of his ashes
by 
a few close family members.

I just feel so lost - like I should be doing something but I don't know 
what.  Can anyone here understand what I mean?

I'm glad this group is here.  Thank you for listening.

Bonnie